The Cullen's Chatter Box
by TheReadingBird
Summary: When the Cullens discover the joy of a chatroom, it could mean bad things for Edward...
1. Shopping

**Hey, everyone. This is a little IM story that I happened to come over. I know there are a lot of these around, but I just thought it might be an experience. **

**Thanks to PrettyPinkBookWorm, I added the little 'stranger danger' thing because it fit so well. If you don't know why that is so funny, go read her story '**

The Cullen's Chatter Box 

SillyBella: Bella

VampTemper: Edward

ICU: Alice

MoodSwinger: Jasper

Joker365: Emmett

BasketofRoses: Rosalie

30goingon310: Carlisle

Sweets: Esme

……………………………………….

The Cullen's Chat Room

_SillyBella has logged on._

_ICU has logged on._

_Joker365 has logged on._

ICU: Hey, Bella?

SillyBella: What?

ICU: Do you wanna…

SillyBella: NO! No, no, no, Alice!

ICU: Hay, you aren't the phycic here.

Joker365: Hi!!!

SillyBella: Says who?

ICU: Says me, that's who.

Joker365: (tries again) HI!!!

SillyBella: Don't even ask, Alice.

ICU: Do you want to, maybe possibly…

SillyBella: No, I will not go shopping with you!

Joker356: I'll go shopping with you! It'll be so much fun…

ICU: What? So you can yell 'stranger danger' at every single unsuspecting passerby? No way!

_VampTemper has logged on._

VampTemper: Hello, Bella. Alice, Emmett.

Joker365: HI!!!

SillyBella: URGG!!!

ICU: URGGGier!!!

_SillyBella has logged off._

_ICU has logged off._

VampTemper: What did I do?

Joker365: HI!!!

VampTemper: (sighs)

_VampTemper has gone to see why Bella is upset._

Joker365: Oooh! I want my log off to say something, too!

_Joker365 is going to dance and sing to random songs to make Edward live up to his username._

At the Cullen's House

"And my hips don't lie…" Emmett sang and shook his butt to the blaring beat coming from the karaoke box. Edward ran into the room, galled.

"What the HELL are you doing, Emmett?" Emmett laughed and picked his brother up.

"Wee!"


	2. Agreed

**Hey, guys. I hope you enjoyed the last chapter, and I'm all up to suggestions.**

**DISCLAIMER: I own nothing! **

The Cullen's Chatter Box 

SillyBella: Bella

VampTemper: Edward

ICU: Alice

MoodSwinger: Jasper

Joker365: Emmett

BasketofRoses: Rosalie

30goingon310: Carlisle

Sweets: Esme

At the Cullens House

The family was gathered in the living room with nothing to do.

Emmett sighed, "What should we do? I am so bored!" The rest of the family pondered this for a while. Finally, Emmett, once again, broke the silence.

"We should go play baseball!" Emmett cried enthusiastically. The rest of the family groaned.

"But it's nighttime." Bella complained. "Not all of us can see in the pitch black. Besides. I told Charlie I was going to be here."

"Fine." Emmett grumbled. "Oooh!" He cried, jumping up from the couch. "Lets all go to different rooms in the house and get on fan chat rooms."

…………………………………………………………

The Harry Potter Chat Room

_The Cullen family has logged on._

Expellia-Me: Welcome, fellow Harry potter fanatics, welcome, to the ROOM.

HarryisHot: Ooh, what is your favorite spell?

BasketofRoses: Err, spell?

Joker365: Ooh, I like the one that makes you barf slugs.

SillyBella: (cringes)

Expellia-Me: Yes, interesting. I enjoy Avada Kadavera curse most. It is most dramatic.

VampTemper: The one where they kill you?

Expellia-Me: Indeed.

BasketofRoses: Oh…ok

ICU: Wow, uhm, yeah.

30goingon310: Is this curse curable?

HarryisHot: No, of course not. Don't you know anything?

Sweets: Err, guys. Uh, I think its time for, err, dinner.

Whole Family: AGREED.

Night of Death chat room

_Cullen family has logged on. _

MylifeisHell: Welcome, fellow life-haters.

Joker365: (whispering) Hey, Edward, you'll fit right in here.

VampTemper: Bite your tongue.

Scarred: How many cuts do you have, brethren?

ICU: I predict that this is way too creepy.

MoodSwinger: I concur.

Joker365: VERBAL CONFUSION!

VampTemper: Good Lord, Emmett, it means I agree.

SillyBella: For being as old as you are, Emmett, I would have guessed that you would know what that means by now.

VampTemper: Shh, Bella.

MylifeisHell: How old, exactly?

Sweets: DINNER!

The CULLENS ROCK MY SOCKS OFF chat room

_The Cullen family has logged on._

_IheartEmmett has logged on._

_Emmettsmine! has logged on._

_Emmettsweetie has logged on._

Joker365: Ooh, I think I might like this one.

BasketofRoses: Like any of them stand a chance.

IheartEmmett: And who are you to say that, little Miss BasketofRoses?

VampTemper: Rosalie…

Emmettsmine!: Read the name, sweetheart.

Emmettsweetie: Why are you fighting over my boyfriend?

BasketofRoses: Your WHAT, exactly?

Emmettsweetie: Did I stutter?

Joker365: Hee, Hee.

(In a hushed tone, the others have a small conversation while the four girls fight over Emmett.)

SillyBella: This is my favorite!

30goingon310: Interesting…

ICU: Poor girls are going to be crushed…

MoodSwinger: Whys that?

ICU: That's why.

(Back at the fight seen, we see a picture of Emmett and Rosalie cuddling of webcam. The other girls scream in fury over their computers.)

VampTemper: Maybe next time we should just play baseball.

Cullen Family: AGREED.


	3. Birthday Time

**Hey everyone. I'm Sorry I haven't updated for a couple of days. I've been grounded from the computer because I ditched youth group…anyways.**

**I love reviews, positive, negative (not too negative), and I enjoy getting constructive critism because that's what makes you better.**

**DISCLAIMER: I own twilight and all its characters about as much as I own you!!! Muhahaha! **

The Cullen's Chatter Box 

SillyBella: Bella

VampTemper: Edward

ICU: Alice

MoodSwinger: Jasper

Joker365: Emmett

BasketofRoses: Rosalie

30goingon310: Carlisle

Sweets: Esme

The Cullen's Chat room

_Joker365 has logged on._

_SillyBella has logged on._

_ICU has logged on._

Joker365: Happy birthday, Bella!

SillyBella: Yeah…what a joyous occasion.

ICU: Oh, come on, Bella, none of the rest of us get birthdays!

SillyBella: Lucky you.

ICU: Don't let Edward catch you saying that.

Joker365: Yeah, don't be a party pooper!

SillyBella: UUGH!

ICU: Ooh, Bella. Did you get the outfit that I asked Edward to give you?

SillyBella: Yeah…it's a little big, Alice. What size was it?

ICU: Oh, a medium.

SillyBella: I wear a small!

ICU: Well, it serves you right! You gots to eat your taters!

SillyBella: Taters?

ICU: That's what I said, bunny bread!

Joker365: What's bread?

_VampTemper has logged on._

VampTemper: Good evening.

SillyBella: Ooh, did you say that with a Transylvanian accent? You could pass for Dracula with a line like that.

VampTemper: Who, Drake? He and I go WAY back.

Joker365: Hey, Edward. What's up?

VampTemper: Err, the ceiling.

Joker365: Oh, VERY FUNNY!

SillyBella: Yeah, I'm cracking up.

VampTemper: I don't understand.

(Crickets chirp in the background.)

VampTemper: Okay…Bella, happy birthday!

SillyBella: Didn't we already go through this?

Joker365: That reminds me…

VampTemper: This _cannot _be good.

At the Cullens

"HAPPY BIRTHDAY, DEAR BELLA! HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU!"

Emmett ended his little tune with a back handspring, a split, and spirit fingers. The Cullen family sat around on the couches, faking snoring. Bella was the only one to applaud.

"Oh, come on! Show Bella some love!" Emmett cried. "Edward get up! Shake your booty for your baby!" Emmett smacked his behind.

Edwards head snapped up from his phony slumber. "

"WHAT did you say?" Emmett threw a frantic look at the rest of the group and skipped out of the room.

"EMMETT, YOU GET THE HELL BACK HERE! I MEAN IT!" Edward dashed out of the room, leaving a tense quiet behind him.

The rest of the family sat listening to the fight going on in silence. Alice finally broke through the silence.

"Why does Edward always end these stories with the word 'hell'? She asked.

Bella started laughing, and the rest of the family turned to look questioningly at her.

"Oh, he's just VampTemper through and through!"


End file.
